I need to see her face. She is pale and breathing fast. Darkness colors the hollows under her eyes; not purple, not brown, but some muddy, delicate mix of the two, not unlike some smudged color you would see touted in a new fall palette on sale at Ulta. On the forty minute drive north…
Fleetings
This morning while walking the dog accompanied by a chatty six-year old, he sited a lone yellow flower in the brush with an exclamation of joy. We walked over and examined it – a cheery yellow face with rings of of minute blood-red pinpricks radiating from the center. I promised to come back and capture…
HeartWalkin’ With the Little Guy
So me and the little guy are going to do the HeartWalk this year. I’d appreciate it if you’d take a peek at the link and donate if you’re inclined. Small amounts are welcomed just as much as big ones🙂 Donation Link I’ve never been good at this kind of thing, unless there was…
Last Grasping of Solitude
For almost seven years of widowhood, I have lived in solitude, with the exception of a one year stint with a co-worker roommate. She opened her home to me for a pittance while I was struggling to get back on my feet upon returning to work and I will always be grateful. I am comfortable…
The Blossom of Benevolence
In my last post I explained the new direction that my life is taking, and the on-boarding of a little one. What has come to light is the beautiful outpouring of sisterly support for the situation. No, not my sisters, as I don’t have any. But the Aunts of my grandson, my other daughters. One…
Sacrifice?
What does that word really mean? The technical meaning is to slaughter an animal, or to offer a person or possession to the Almighty. Yet I have heard that word related to what I am about to embark upon; the taking on of a six-year-old boy to raise for a while, to help untangle a…
Surviving Face Off, Black Tie Frenzy and Plain Life
Wise words of the day: Image lifted from: http://girlyme.tumblr.com/post/92870248438/filson-wise-words via Pinterest. In case the deafening silence did not clue you in, the months leading up to surgery were quite a struggle for me, and I wrestled with depression, the reality of being alone and often invisible, the roles I fill in the family circle and a…
Fifteen minutes ago
Fifteen minutes ago It was that day. The day I flew. The day I decided not to counteroffer on a house I really liked. The day I last heard “I love you so much.” The day I last shared a newspaper with anyone. I wonder when this day’s awareness will fade from my brain. When…
Things that make me scream, take notice or engage me
Politics. That’s a screamer for me. I’m happy you have an opinion – please, keep it to yourself. Just for the record I support neither party, registered Independent, and try to vote on issues when I vote. What’s in the political news lately? The damned Fast Track Trade agreement. I’m currently neither for nor against,…
How to Impersonate a Calliope and other sickly fun
Ah yes, I bet you thought the topic would be more romantic when I caught up on the blog, yes? Actually, I’ve been so mentally busy that the title choices were difficult to narrow down, but since I’m coming off of a serious (for me) illness, this was that one which stuck. I should back track…
Is there life offline?
So what, you may ask, can one DO when there is no internet to absorb, delight, educate, aggravate and titillate? If you are a geeky person like me, you read. Yes, those book things that we house in places called libraries and line up in bookstores filled with the intoxicating aroma of, well, probably glue,…
I’m baaaack : )
I have internet at home again…woohoo! That was painful, being without the ‘net in some ways. In others, it was refreshing and more stimulating than sitting in front of the computer reading. I’ll catch up during the week, or try to. Thanks to all who inquired about me. Since I was last riding off into…
It’s Raining Frogs
“Plop.” The sound came soft and clear from somewhere in the fading dusk. I looked around for what it might be and there, unmoving in the dark, was the shape of a frog. As I approached for a better look it shook off the fall and hopped away. It made me smile. Back to reading.…
Wordless Wednesday – Art in Nature
Alight
Notes from an RV Park
It has been a stretch of interesting days. I’m not certain how my life always seems to amble along like a comedy, but it does most of the time. It could be that I am just silly🙂 I ran up against a wall this week that I’ve not encountered ever I don’t think, since I…
Gurl on wheels – spastically settling in and what it is teaching me
Quote of the week: “…People should be able to walk into their back yards and say, ‘that’s a cicada, that’s a tree frog, and that’s a bird.’ Then, when they hear a bird scream, ‘get out of my territory, get out of my territory,’ I want them to recognize the cadence and remember that…
The Intimacy of Moving
Just like going to the Doctor for a check up is not intimate when compared with the touch of one who knows you, neither is having professional movers wrangle your stuff from one place to another. But to have people who know me trail their fingers through my things is something quite different for me. It is…
Memorabilicus – or The Umbilicus of Memory Found in Objects
Catchy and academic-sounding title eh? My brain works weirdly in sleep deprivation mode. I also love to make up words that have meaning probably only to me. Last night was a late night (morning) working as the next in line is out for medical assistance for his partner. That left me in charge of herding…
Riding the Four C’s
Reading novels makes me feel like I am stuck in a really bad one sometimes, one that I might produce on my first stab at such. Since I’m winnowing my books, my reward for working towards packing is reading books I’m getting rid of before spiraling into sleep, instead of my normal perusal of the…
And so it begins…
I did it! I am now the owner of a rolling version of a tiny house. Well, me and the credit union🙂 And yes, I drove it, adrenaline inducing event that was. I’m scheduled for a full driving course prior to taking actual delivery, after it goes through its bells and whistles review and safety…
The gory…err glory road to downsizing ‘stuff’.
Yes, it is gory. Gut-wrenching. Painful. Overwhelming. That’s why I am taking a break to write about it instead of doing it. Heh. We squirrel away for all kinds of maybes. Maybe they won’t make (insert item of choice) any more. We stock and store because we’ve a prepper mentality so maybe there will…
Blither and blather about little things that matter
Did you know that online RV shopping is a LOT like online dating? No? I did it for you, so you don’t have to. In all seriousness, it is somewhat similar. Nice photos. Catchy list of amenities. Make appointment. Show up. Think you must be at wrong place as nothing looks like the photos. Then…
Thoughts from the week
I feel like I’ve joined the ‘writer’s abstinence club’ of sorts lately. I think of great things to write, but I’m busily doing something else, and then I have tasks to tackle or familial bonds to reinforce with listening, advice, interventions or the like, and a dog to walk and a job, and well, then…
Rose Seep Visionary – a poem
**************************** Did I feel a tug at the corner of the dream Which I must have ignored, glossed over Darted at through rose-colored glasses Via an edgewise glance And kept on dreaming, looking forward Did I hear ambivalence whisper, or Was it dissonance maybe? They can be so hard to differentiate, tease apart No matter…
Monday musings of a mentalist (the British sort, not the magical sort)
I’ve been on sensory overload lately – not sure why. In this post are tidbits of thought, internal and external conversations, sights and smells, a photo or two and the requisite songs that have been running through my mind lately. Best read while drinking hot tea and listening to Jackie Greene’s “Travelin’ Song” Don’t have…
Minimalism, life and hiking
When you begin to consider carrying all that you need on your back for a few months, the contents of your home begin to loom in the mind as well. The idea of ‘comfort’, ‘luxury’ or ‘morale’ items becomes a topic of thought. We really don’t think about these things day to day, just like…
Grandsons, tumbles and trail names
Yesterday was a rare treat, a double-header with two of my daughters and my four grandsons, plus helping the third daughter watch shop by text🙂 It was also a two restaurant meal day for me, which is exceedingly unusual. In the midst of my ‘fake hiking & camping’ fun I had a birthday luncheon date…
Walking into 2015
I remember the times when January 1st was a bleary-eyed sleeping in day. A day that didn’t require going to work, woohoo! Those days seem to be long behind me, although if I had television I might still be tempted to watch the ball drop in Times Square. This year my goal was to go to…
Who are you and what have you done with my Mother?
I can tell you first hand that widowhood sucks. Just like when you marry, you learn to blend, compromise and bend to fit into a pair and it is a little awkward – stops, starts, spills, so too, is widowhood. In a culture that practically elevates partnership to sainthood status, suddenly finding oneself pulling in…
Vulnerability has a scent, and I wasn’t wearing it
…and other unusual things said to me lately. Scent has always played a huge role in my life. As such, I own probably an inordinate amount of scented things, personal and home. I picked up a new perfume on a trip. It is very green, woodsy with a mossy undertone at dry down. It reminds…
This and that and other things
It has been a long and pensive non-public time for me, kicked into gear by the emotional trip to my property followed fast on the heels by Thanksgiving with family, and then as usual, ruminations on all kinds of things. While I’ve written some offline to keep the creative trickle alive, the rest of me…
36 hours upright, 3 hours of sleep, rough weather = goofy chick
Ensconced back in the micro-haus in balmy weather, last week feels like it passed in some kind of dream form. I’m pretty bone-weary in all honesty. It was a very emotional trip, in both good and bad ways, thanks to incredible friends. The roughshod road trip was to pick up venison on another person’s timeline.…
At 13 degrees, don’t touch the iced tent sides!
This experience, while considered by many to be slightly insane, is very educational for me. It is an opportunity to learn while learning is optional and not mandatory, or driven by necessity. I’ve known too many people relegated to a lifestyle they didn’t anticipate with no foreknowledge, myself included. The saving grace in my sleeping…
Brrrrrrrrrraving the elements (or how to have everyone call you crazy)
So I am on site in the midst of the great Polar Vortex caper (hmmm, didn’t I mention flailing in the vortex a few posts ago…prescient of me eh?) I like to camp. A lot. So in order to give the new widow some personal space I brought my camping gear since there is acreage…
Hitchhiking ghosts on road trips
I have made this run up 75 North so many times I should be able to do it in my sleep, but this is the first time in ten years I finally did it without taking a printed map. I’m directionally challenged in many ways and so I often don’t trust myself. But in the…
Pampering, planning and the musical backdrop
Going to a salon is not really about vanity so much. It is about going some place where someone takes care of you. I was reminded of this yesterday, as someone brought me coffee, I read magazines I normally do not see and enjoy human touch while having my hair washed. I don’t go any…
Minimalist
The Daily Post popped into my Inbox tonight, for minimalist photos. This one immediately sprung to mind.
Stark. Past prime. Depth. Beauty.
In bloom, the Zinnia is cheerful, multi-layered, attention grabbing. But even here, there is a shadow of its former life.
Beauty surrounds us, but usually we need to be walking in a garden to know it.~Rumi
Shabbat shalom.
~SE
11.3.14 Monday Music Mention – City ‘Am Fenster’ (At the window)
I’ve not done one of these in a long while. During a mini-blog catch up session last night I came across this song on wederwill’s blog. I had never heard of the band or the song. But there is something gripping about it, haunting in its melody, musical composition and beat. I thought I would…
Picking straws
Delicious Fall has fallen upon us for a brief spell and I am relishing it! Doors and sliders thrown open, fans positioned to bring all of that fresh, low humidity air in has really boosted my spirits. It makes working out an invigorating thing rather than a flirtation with heat stroke and misery. I wrote…
Flailing in the Vortex and carrying my Rubber Ducky!
Okay, so there isn’t really a vortex in my life, but there are times as I stand beside my life and look at it that I could swear I can feel the sucking sounds at my feet and hear the power of the strength of the pull away from those things I desire to accomplish or…
Leave-taking and beauty in the wilds
Leave-taking is always bittersweet when it is a long-time friend who is often more family than actual family. I’ve spent a lovely nine days in the Midwest in marvelous company, been fed delicious food, gone out and about, and now am sitting in the airport waiting to return home via Chicago. The trip in was…
10.1.14 Wordless Wednesday – Can you find nature’s photobomber :)
Hint: Click to full-size. “In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks.” — John Muir ~SE
Zany for Zinnias!
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The Third Garment – Scent
I don’t write often on the more feminine aspects of life that tend to lift and enrobe us in comfort and pleasure, like the tactile feel of certain fabrics,the weather; things combined with scent. Scent is one of my all time favorite mood drivers. In this arena I am always torn between the natural and…
Music, Moving and Mayhem
Briefly dipping my pinkie toe in the blogging world for a moment as the mayhem in my life mounts! First, on moving: I was |this| close to securing a tiny rental house; well, tiny for most standards. It is more than 4x the size of where I live now. But, you have to be poised…
9.24.14 Wordless Wednesday “A Moment in the Garden”
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9.17.14 Wordless Wednesday – The Overlooked Beauty of ‘Weeds’
Work-Life Balance or How Not to Collapse in a Heap
As you may (or, may not) have noticed, I’ve pretty much been MIA except for a couple of automatic posts I set up last weekend in a five minute period of calm. That title up there…do you recall when it even entered our lingo? Work-Life Balance. Work used to be something you did between 8-5…
9.10.14 Wordless Wednesday – Perspective
9.8.14 Monday Music Mention – Imogen Heap
I know, I missed last week. Last Monday was a no-work day and almost a no-computer day too. Hopefully y’all were off doing fun things like dancing, grilling, grabbing some end-of-summer fun. I’ve been on a bit of a hiatus due to stress, and hope to be back writing again soon. In the meantime,…
