It’s fall, y’all!

And, it’s been a while since I wrote anything. I’ve been busy traveling, trying my hand at other forms of expression like watercolor (long way to go on that media!), Junk collage mixed media, alcohol inks, bone art, photography, and practicing looking at things differently. Today the real chill of fall is in the air,…

River Run

The title may be a tad misleading… There is a river, but no one’s running 🤣I do ride my bike beside the Colorado, though. As our camping group breaks apart bit by bit, the pace slows considerably. As folks move on, more arrive. Sometimes we have visitors for a few hours and then they mosey…

Sleeping Under the Stars

I finally fulfilled one of my dreams out here, to sleep in the open, under the stars. It’s something I’d only do in a safe place. Last night I visited my original camp for a potluck, but I was packed to the gills for a camp move. Seemed like the perfect place to try it…

Impressions of Life

I came out to the PAR TR for a weekend of fun, to shuck off a couple of difficult weeks and to just relax. What I’ve experienced turned out to be much more. In a world that grows more expansive each day via the Internet, people seem to be growing more isolated and lost feeling;…

Defining preciousness and value

  So, I bought a campervan.  Nothing big, nothing fancy, nothing new. Just new to me. I want to approach this kind of like a fiddler crab, edging sideways towards a new hole in the sand; or maybe a hermit crab, checking a new shell for a better fit, always remembering that it is me…

What do *I* want to do?

A friend of mine recently said ” It doesn’t matter what anyone else wants, what do YOU want to do?”  I thought back to what my goals were before Plannus Interruptus (common ailment for plans, no doctor needed).  Remember nearly five years ago when I bought an RV and planned on paying off debt and…

“Pooh hasn’t much Brain but he never comes to any harm…”

The Unexamined Life is Not Worth Living A decade. One hundred and twenty months. Three thousand six hundred and fifty days. And so on.  The pain of missing has diminished, except on the days when it has not. Those days have at least become less and less frequent. Philosopher and Poet David Whyte says of…

Prismatic

If you only knew me like I know me But that’s not true I am mother,daughter,woman,artist,worker,gypsy,friend The facet you see depends on where the light is brightest At that moment If I only knew me like I wish you to know me But what is true How can I be all of this and any…

Saving Wasps & Relishing Quiet

I saved another wasp today. No, no, not the White Anglo-Saxon Protestant type. The flying, stinging type. “Why?” will be most people’s response, understandably. But, I feel that wasps get a bad rap. They live all around my house – on the ceiling of the mud room, on the door frame of my front door,…

Looking back over my shoulder (aka 2016 in Review)

My goal is to make a post a day to wrap up 2016 and teeter into the unformed abyss of 2017 🙂 Carapasces of Dreams The dry wind chattered Winding through the carapaces of dreams Discarded in corners Shrugged off during a mental molt   Raw skin couldn’t decide Whether to embrace the nakedness For…

Fleetings

This morning while walking the dog accompanied by a chatty six-year old, he sited a lone yellow flower in the brush  with an exclamation of joy. We walked over and examined it – a cheery yellow face with rings of of minute blood-red pinpricks radiating from the center.  I promised to come back and capture…

Surviving Face Off, Black Tie Frenzy and Plain Life

Wise words of the day: Image lifted from: http://girlyme.tumblr.com/post/92870248438/filson-wise-words via Pinterest. In case the deafening silence did not clue you in, the months leading up to surgery were quite a struggle for me, and I wrestled with depression, the reality of being alone and often invisible, the roles I fill in the family circle and a…

Fifteen minutes ago

Fifteen minutes ago It was that day. The day I flew. The day I decided not to counteroffer on a house I really liked. The day I last heard “I love you so much.” The day I last shared a newspaper with anyone. I wonder when this day’s awareness will fade from my brain. When…

Things that make me scream, take notice or engage me

Politics.  That’s a screamer for me. I’m happy you have an opinion – please, keep it to yourself. Just for the record I support neither party, registered Independent, and try to vote on issues when I vote.  What’s in the political news lately?  The damned Fast Track Trade agreement.  I’m currently neither for nor against,…

It’s Raining Frogs

“Plop.” The sound came soft and clear from somewhere in the fading dusk. I looked around for what it might be and there, unmoving in the dark, was the shape of a frog. As I approached for a better look it shook off the fall and hopped away. It made me smile. Back to reading.…

Memorabilicus – or The Umbilicus of Memory Found in Objects

Catchy and academic-sounding title eh? My brain works weirdly in sleep deprivation mode. I also love to make up words that have meaning probably only to me. Last night was a late night (morning) working as the next in line is out for medical assistance for his partner. That left me in charge of herding…

Blither and blather about little things that matter

Did you know that online RV shopping is a LOT like online dating? No? I did it for you, so you don’t have to. In all seriousness, it is somewhat similar. Nice photos. Catchy list of amenities. Make appointment. Show up. Think you must be at wrong place as nothing looks like the photos. Then…

Thoughts from the week

I feel like I’ve joined the ‘writer’s abstinence club’ of sorts lately. I think of great things to write, but I’m busily doing something else, and then I have tasks to tackle or familial bonds to reinforce with listening, advice, interventions or the like, and a dog to walk and a job, and well, then…

Monday musings of a mentalist (the British sort, not the magical sort)

I’ve been on sensory overload lately – not sure why. In this post are tidbits of thought, internal and external conversations, sights and smells, a photo or two and the requisite songs that have been running through my mind lately. Best read while drinking hot tea and listening to Jackie Greene’s “Travelin’ Song” Don’t have…

Grandsons, tumbles and trail names

Yesterday was a rare treat, a double-header with two of my daughters and my four grandsons, plus helping the third daughter watch shop by text 🙂  It was also a two restaurant meal day for me, which is exceedingly unusual. In the midst of my ‘fake hiking & camping’ fun I had a birthday luncheon…

Who are you and what have you done with my Mother?

I can tell you first hand that widowhood sucks.  Just like when you marry, you learn to blend, compromise and bend to fit into a pair and it is a little awkward – stops, starts, spills, so too, is widowhood.  In a culture that practically elevates partnership to sainthood status, suddenly finding oneself pulling in…

Vulnerability has a scent, and I wasn’t wearing it

…and other unusual things said to me lately. Scent has always played a huge role in my life. As such, I own probably an inordinate amount of scented things, personal and home. I picked up a new perfume on a trip.  It is very green, woodsy with a mossy undertone at dry down.  It reminds…

This and that and other things

It has been a long and pensive non-public time for me, kicked into gear by the emotional trip to my property followed fast on the heels by Thanksgiving with family, and then as usual, ruminations on all kinds of things. While I’ve written some offline to keep the creative trickle alive, the rest of me…

Hitchhiking ghosts on road trips

I have made this run up 75 North so many times I should be able to do it in my sleep, but this is the first time in ten years I finally did it without taking a printed map. I’m directionally challenged in many ways and so I often don’t trust myself.  But in the…

Pampering, planning and the musical backdrop

Going to a salon is not really about vanity so much.  It is about going some place where someone takes care of you. I was reminded of this yesterday, as someone brought me coffee, I read magazines I normally do not see and enjoy human touch while having my hair washed. I don’t go any…

Picking straws

Delicious Fall has fallen upon us for a brief spell and I am relishing it! Doors and sliders thrown open, fans positioned to bring all of that fresh, low humidity air in has really boosted my spirits. It makes working out an invigorating thing rather than a flirtation with heat stroke and misery.  I wrote…

Work-Life Balance or How Not to Collapse in a Heap

As you may (or, may not) have noticed, I’ve pretty much been MIA except for a couple of automatic posts I set up last weekend in a five minute period of calm.  That title up there…do you recall when it even entered our lingo? Work-Life Balance. Work used to be something you did between 8-5…

8.25.14 Monday Music Mention – Jack Savoretti

So much emotion roiling in me this week made it a challenge to choose a musical talent to highlight. Jack won out because of the rawness of his emotion in the music coupled with a connection that I feel  internally. My connections are always mental.  I love a good and active mind 🙂 This song…

Free Flow

It is no mystery to those close to me that this is a difficult time.  What follows is simply another free flow writing I did, similar to “Skin Tight” a few months ago. ****************************** It is trying to try, try and try again. It wearies and robs the soul of happiness that it is its…

Collage of the Mind

Quoting Berry from Word and Flesh: “The religion and the environmentalism of the highly industrialized countries are at bottom a sham, because they make it their business to fight against something that they do not really want to destroy. We all live by robbing nature, but our standard of living demands that the robbery shall…

Victims – Born, Groomed or Happenstance – Final

 A bit of beauty from my garden for my readers ******************************** I sometimes write about topics that are difficult to face, things one wishes to turn away from, bury, ignore.  Some read, some don’t.  Either is okay with me.  What does matter is if something I have written helps another person.  In truth, reality is…

Gift From a Dog

There are days when being a responsible adult just drains you. Yesterday was one of those for me. A storm had taken out my primary internet on Sunday. This means all day in the office, rather than a half day in and then finishing up my work at home.  This means no tadpole kissy faces…

Decisions, always decisions about writing

I’ve spent the last two days thinking over this experiment that I practiced in July, of posting almost every day.  I wanted to see if I could keep that pace, while working and trying to have a semblance of life with my family and friends as well.  I enjoyed it immensely, but I have found…

A Measure of Self-Worth (Is it like a Pig in a Poke?)

Welcome to Time Travel Tuesday, where I go back to something somewhere on my blog. A reader’s comment on a post from last week sent my brain into overdrive mode.  Sometimes I pick at things like they are a new bone; gnawing at them, burying it, walking away, going and digging it up to gnaw…

Cloudburst

Some days you have retrograde reflections, instead of retrograde amnesia.  Small insights of what things were back some other time.  We always think of what it is like to live with another, knowing their thoughts, their faults, habits good and bad.  Rarely do we look at what it is like to live with us; how it…

7.25.14 Friday Frivolous Foolishness

Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit’s Friday 🙂  You get only a small ‘wooT’ out of me because I am plum tuckered out.  International clients were in house for the last four days, so the office was all atwitter and off schedule due to excess meeting-itis, kow-tow-itis and general executive angst. It all ended well, so, you know “All’s well…

Passion, Pleasure and Friendship

…no, no, not that kind. (But you clicked, hah!)   Hey, even *I* know what sells 😉 Last night I actually got off work before dark! While it was a baking, sticky, humid day, the evening turned nicely. I was able to spend time outside, doing a bit of weeding, some sweeping and some soaking…

The rest of the story…

The other day I published a quote of my own.  But in part, it was a lie.  This was the quote: “Sexual abuse in the young creates the neediest people, who will tell you we need nothing; we live that way too.  We are taught by actions that there is no real love; there is no trust,…

Life Snapshot

Today is Shabbat.  A time free of work world constraints.  Time to absorb beauty, reflect beauty and warmth, radiate that back to others.  A time for thinking, for being. A time for giving thanks.  I smell like the woods, having finally finished my sun-steeping of a new body oil I created, scented with vetiver, peru…

Victims – Born, Groomed or Happenstance? Part 1

“’..and what will you trade for these things that you desire?’ he intoned flatly. ‘Blood, tears, sweat?’ I felt smaller even than before. ‘But, you see, I’ve already given all of that; and yet I still stand here before you empty-handed, without the Affection. Is there, there… no other way?’ My voice trails away imperceptibly,…

Fridge Forensics…no, not the science stuff inside.

While I was cleaning     – an interjection into your day outside of my normal posting schedule.  Yes, it has to be done.  I’d love to be able to snap my fingers and have this chore away, but it isn’t so.  What I so dislike about cleaning, is that once you begin, you see more to…

Today (a vignette)

Today Today I visited Shanghai in the rain, circumnavigated the mass of people and the vibrant colors of parasols sheltering the dreams dreamt only perhaps in Mandarin, beyond my comprehension, but their beauty I can interpret without a translator. I then traipsed from there to Lebanon, where wearied field workers rested against stacks of wheat…

The People You Meet…Dennis

I would like to tell you that Dennis and I had a sit-down today, but we did not. It rained during the time he was supposed to be doing some carpentry work, but I lugged all of my equipment to the car anyway, figuring he might be hanging out at McD’s or such.  I drove…

The People You Meet…

Did you ever have a night where you just felt down?  No really good reason, just…down.  I was feeling that way tonight, as I headed out to get some creamer from the convenience store, and maybe a Mocha Frappe from the health food store known as Mickey D’s. I’m not telling this story to talk…

Buy less, have less, worry less?

I continue my march (shuffle?) on towards a return to living closer to the natural world, with a lighter footprint, more mindful consumption, growing more of my own food (leaf and limb) and trying to reduce what I already own. Egads, you simply don’t know the cycle, the pressure of it on those around you,…

Exploring the Void

In quiet and through reflection, when I really want to get to the bottom of things, make sense, improve who I am, I peer into the Void. The Void is the place where other people developed things that I never did.  What you read here is years of self-discovery; things I never had the quiet…

Thursday Tale-Tellers Tattle – Writer Intros

Yes, another new thing!  A regular reader asked “Why are you doing different things than you’ve always done?”  I think it is a good question, so if any of my long-time followers (or new ones!) may be wondering the same, here’s the back story. Taking to heed “Write what you know”, my focus for years…

Dating at past the half-century mark

Today I am imitating a sage, so, bear with me. Since I have removed myself from the dating world (not that I was ever really in it since widowhood), I find it is easier to think about.  It is akin to trying to think about grocery shopping while eating I suppose. It has come to…

Stone Cold?

In the not too distant past, a male friend remarked that I am ‘emotionally cold.’  Another said “You are a self-contained package, needing nothing, from all appearances.”  Am I, I wondered? It isn’t the first time that I’ve heard those words; they echo a sentiment my late husband once struck me with during a heartfelt…

Getting better acquainted with Berry, and an ode to solitude.

This week is the annual customer visit for one of my largest clients, so time will be sparse to write, as well as the solitude and quiet that I require to do so.  But discipline is required to form habits, so…go easy on my content this week 🙂   I first read Wendell Berry several…